New “Ebony” Article: Stop Telling Women How to Not Get Raped

We’re going back to our roots with several posts here; this blog originally launched as a resource for female rape survivors. We’ll continue to offer that and much more.

It is so refreshing to see this article title! Granted, we don’t even reach five comments before someone starts trolling, but people were able to keep the comments focused for that first page. I didn’t read comments beyond that.

If you are a male rape survivor reading this, you are not alone and not left out. Read this past blog post specifically for you (and there are others).


NO! A Rape Documentary

This documentary is worth watching, particularly the trailer and several brief video testimonials by rape survivors available there on the home page. It is about rape, violence, and other types of oppression against women.

The film has French, Spanish, and Portuguese subtitles.

Teenage Girls as Sex Offenders

Although there’s very little literature and research on this group (girls 13-17), they do exist. Key differences from other groups:

  • They aren’t pedophiles, strictly speaking; their sexual attraction is widely variable and sexual activity/offenses may include different ages, from children to adults.
  • They typically have a more severe (and of longer duration) history of having been sexually abused themselves than comparable male offenders.

Beyond that, we can only speculate. Current limited research points in certain directions, but we can’t be sure until more and larger studies are done, and so far, that hasn’t happened. That’s one of the things this important paper calls for.


I support all our representatives in voting NO on SOPA/PIPA and Internet censorship. Today will be a blackout day on this blog.

Most Read Post, Most Commented Post and Worst Response Post

Stylized red drawing of a person with upraised armsBy far the most read post is Profile of a Child Molester. No other post has even come close to it in terms of unique viewers. It’s no surprise that that post is also the most commented on the blog. For any period, by any measure, this is the most popular post.

Surprise? The second most commented post on this blog is Marital Rape. This, too, has held consistent over time.

The worst response was to an early post, Street Harassment on Public Transport. As an inexperienced blogger, I got into a fruitless discussion with a reader who was irate that some countries were considering and implementing separate transportation for women since women, of course, are the source of all evil in the universe. I didn’t know then that whether male or female, such readers only feel encouraged by any response you make, and they don’t read anything you write. After learning valuable lessons from the exchange, I ended up deleting the whole conversation from the comments section. Let’s just say it started negatively and went downhill from there. Whee, that was entertaining.

I’ll post occasionally about the most popular topics. Use this as a springboard to suggest ideas or send in questions.


Links to All New Social Media

Stylized red drawing of person with arms raisedI posted these last week but they bear posting again. Go to FB and Like the page, or go to Twitter and Follow. Or both. It’s a quicker, easier way to keep up with new posts!

Facebook Page (under the name Zoe Mars)

Twitter account (ForTheRecord2)

What I Wish They’d Invent

This is one for you to respond to! I’ll start us off with a couple of ideas. This is all pure imagination. (I believe I’ve mentioned my idealistic bent.)

  • You know those radar guns police officers have to check your speed when you’re driving? I wish they’d invent one of those that women could carry to point at men and figure out which ones are dangerous. You know what would happen if women had those? They’d be as nice and trusting as men could ever want (to the good men, that is). If there were a special alarm for a man who just specifically targeted you for rape, well, I’d pay a lot extra for that feature. These devices would be good for men too.
  • A Violence Policy, liability insurance that men who kidnap/rape/beat/harass women have to buy before attacking anyone. Then women could drive up the premiums by taking self-defense classes en masse. Again, this could apply to men.
  • Self-defense classes for girls in every middle school and high school, as part of the curriculum.
  • Classes (or at least a semester’s worth of study) on boundaries and respect between the sexes, taught to both boys and girls in middle school and high school.
  • Teachers, parents, and society setting an example of respectful, non-sexist behavior by men toward women.
  • An organization specifically for open dialog between men and women. No insulting, derailing, blaming, etc. allowed. There’d have to be certain rigid conversational rules in place for this to work, and I imagine it should be by invitation only to prevent the organization from attracting haters of both sexes, who would ruin it for everyone. We all have questions and ideas. This would be a safe space to (respectfully) converse, debate, and exchange ideas.

Are you laughing your head off? Yeah, me too. So let’s hear your ideas. Brainstorm. Toss ’em out. The stakes are low here.